SO FRUSTERATED!!

so today I wolfed down a cake and milk, cereal peanut butter and a banana and barley threw up. My mom is thinking of sending me to a 4 week program in the hospital bc I am out of control. Does anyone have any suggestions? I dont know what to do. I want to lose 15 pounds now. im probably up to like 120 now. im 5'3 and that's a shit load for me. Im use to being only 90- 110 pounds. this is the most ive wieghd for a long time. Im so frustrated bc food is just my life as of now. I dont know what to do. I feel fat, ugly, unwanted, low, far from myself. far from perfection.